Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
