i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
it's great music for shaving your balls
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize