No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Small penises have feelings too.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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