i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Randomize
