I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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