the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize