I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Randomize
