His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
i think im in europe. pls send help
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.