my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
His hands were made for my vagina.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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