I think i sorta joined a cult last night
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Semen is not good for contacts.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Randomize
