It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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