There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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