Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
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I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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