so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
