he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
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