i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
