Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
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