We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize