why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
