super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize