would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
