Me too!
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
