Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Call me so I can make it juicy for ya

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.

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(281): View more from Texas

I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.

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(404): View more from Georgia

i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".

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(910): View more from North Carolina

just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.

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(434): View more from Virginia

my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.

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