It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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