living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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