Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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