what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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