Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?