I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
