You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
