i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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