Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
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We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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