i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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