so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
