Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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