well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
