I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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