how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize