She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
