she was so not down for the gang bang
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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