doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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