he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
