How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize