Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize