you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
