I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
