i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize