Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
