dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
