Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
He has the fingertips of a God
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