Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize